Bittersweet
by Akizuki Sai
Summary: Definition: tinged with sadness. Thoughts in the lives of two unlikely characters. Set of drabbles written for 30 Angsts.
1. Broken

**BITTERSWEET**

**BROKEN**

_For Lulu-chan_

I am a child, the same time I am an adult.

Within me are two beings: myself and someone long dead.

Along with my memories are bits and pieces of someone else's life. And within my veins run his power, a power so strong it could see the future – an ability that has helped me plan my actions carefully and has bound my life to chains.

What is there to explore in the world when I know everything anyway?

And what is the use of doing something if I know I'll just get hurt in the end?

Is it all worth it? If it isn't then it isn't worth my time.

Such thoughts deprived me of many things, things like the innocent bliss of waiting for Santa Claus on Christmas Eve, the curiosity over why the sky is blue, why leaves turn orange every autumn – all that and more.

But even with all the power I have I can never turn back time and undo everything. I can never bring back the childhood I lost, my life that was broken.

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**Standard Disclaimers Apply**

Comments are appreciated.

**Note (11/21/06)**: I initially planned on elaborating the concept of this chapter further, but had to scrap the idea at the last minute because of a hundred and one reasons (plot, personal issues). Because I don't have the heart to delete or replace it (since I've been really fond of the idea), I decided that each chapter will present a different story from this point on instead.


	2. Irony

**Important Note**: I originally wanted to post one drabble at a time, but considering the length of each (barely a hundred), I figured it would be best if I post drabbles that go together as one chapter instead. Each chapter will be narrating a different story.

**Disclaimer: **CLAMP and affiliated companies own Card Captor Sakura. Each drabble is inspired from a list of themes at 30angsts, a writing community at Livejournal.

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**Theme 1: Broken**

She reminds him of one of those Grecian statues he once saw at a local museum - tall, beautiful and stoic. Like any work of art, people always admire her from a safe distance, praising her smile, her face, her voice, her stature.

Sometimes he wonders if any of them noticed how her smile is starting to look strained as the days go by, like the way a statue slowly deteriorates from the passing of time; breaking bit by bit.

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**Theme 2: Toys**

For Tomoyo's 16th birthday, Sonomi Daidouji had her toy company release a limited edition of Tomoyo Dolls. She had her best designer lead the project, and the dolls served as souvenirs in the lavish party she organized for her only daughter.

Eriol was among the first to get a doll, and inwardly he noticed how the designer was able to capture every single detail about her, including the bittersweet happiness in her eyes.

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**Theme 3: Handphone**

It was a couple of weeks since Eriol's return to Tomoeda when Tomoyo cornered him by the locker room.

With feigned confidence (he noticed how her fingers slightly shook) she handed him a box the size of a small notebook.

"What is this, Daidouji-san?" he asked, curious.

"A handphone," she said in a bare whisper. His eyes widened in confusion by her reply, and he was about to ask her what it was for when she looked up at him, her eyes moist and pained and she said, "So I can call you, you said I can call you anytime, right?"

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**Theme 4: Angels and Devils**

People always associated him with the devil and her with the angel, claiming that he was wicked, mischievous and evil, while she was kind, understanding and good.

Little people know that he was actually the good guy in the story. He would always reach out to her, waiting for her to open up, but she would always push him away, not wanting to break free from her own misery (and he would always get hurt in the process).

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**Theme 5: True Love**

"There was this saying that if you love somebody, you should set her free. If she comes back, then she's yours; but if she doesn't, then you were never meant to be. That's why I never told Sakura."

"I don't believe that."

"Why is that?"

"If you really love somebody, then you should fight for her no matter what. That's why I'm not letting you go."

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**Theme 6: Curiosity**

She would be lying if she said he never intrigued her. He was, after all, the only person who claimed that she was transparent - and he did prove himself right a number of times.

It amazed her and scared her at the same time. But he was enigmatic, charming and witty, and she couldn't resist coming close to him.

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**Theme 7: Interest**

With their growing closeness, fear started to overwhelm him. She was too good for him. Sometimes he was afraid that she would be the price he would have to pay for all the mistakes he did in his past life; and he could never bear the thought of losing her, but he knew right from the very beginning that he would lose her either way.

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**Theme 8: Articles, Newspapers**

It was at the morning paper, written in bold capital letters, making everything sound so final and cold and heartbreaking:

**PIANIST DIES IN CAR ACCIDENT, ZAIBATSU HEIRESS IN COMA**

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Comments are appreciated.


	3. The Makings of a Tragedy

**Disclaimer: **CLAMP and affiliated companies own Card Captor Sakura. Each drabble is inspired from a list of themes at 30angsts, a writing community at Livejournal.

**Important Note:** Ratings go up at Theme 16 (very subtle lime).

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**Theme 9: Hide and Seek**

He has been looking for her for two lifetimes, and she has been hiding from him all this time.

Looking for somebody who does not want to be found has always been difficult, but he doesn't want to give up. Not now. Not when he's this close.

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**Theme 10: Messenger**

She sent one of her bodyguards to meet him because she didn't think she'll be able to talk to him without crying, and the last thing she wanted him to see was how weak she really was.

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**Theme 11: Ice**

He was persistent. He wasn't willing to give her up without a fight, so he camped outside her mansion and created a fiasco when Sonomi had policemen take him away.

She saw all this from her bedroom window, and the sight of him trying to break free from the two policemen holding him down sent her running outside.

He stopped at the sight of her, his eyes relieved and hopeful, until she opened her mouth and said with a voice so cold, he could feel the world turn black and white, _"Please, go away."_

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**Theme 12: Chemistry**

It all started in Music Class. Their teacher, enthralled by their duet, said the two of them have chemistry, and then Yamazaki started telling everyone how Chemistry is linked to love (something about how it is a one in a million chance to find people with chemistry). One thing led to another, and the next thing they knew, the whole class was teasing them, treating them like a couple.

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**Theme 13: Physics**

"We should stop this while we still can."

"I don't understand."

"What we're doing will be like falling from the hundredth floor, you'll break."

"A fall from the hundredth floor isn't any different from a fall somewhere at the middle. I don't care if I fall."

"Then I'll fall with you."

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**Theme 14: Kiss**

No one had seen her for the entire day. Neither he nor her mother knew of her whereabouts. He skipped six classes just to look for her. The Music room, the cooking lab, Twin Bells, Piffle Princess, Penguin Park - he searched everywhere, but with not much luck.

Towards the end of the day, he found her by the Tsukimine Shrine, unconscious, underneath the huge cherry tree by the entrance. The sound of his shoes hitting the pavement woke her, and teary-eyed she rushed to embrace him.

Still catching his breath, the sun blinding his eyes, and sweat trickling down from his forehead to her cheek, he kissed her.

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**Theme 15: First Time**

She was a lot of firsts for him: the first person who surprised him more than once, the first to make him laugh like there's no tomorrow, the first girl who intimidated him, the first person he ever loved with all his heart, and the first person to ever break his heart. Twice.

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**Theme 16: Appropriate**

He never thought she could be so bold.

The moment her skin touched his, he could feel his cheeks turn warm, and it took him a great amount of self-control to push her away and tell her, "We shouldn't be doing this."

But when her eyes met his, the scent of her hair overwhelming him, she ended up winning the battle.

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**Theme 17: Eh...Hmmm**

He didn't know why she became so cold all of a sudden. Everything he did to please her ended up making her angry, and it made him worry.

He never thought she was capable of anger, for he had always been used to seeing her smiling, and radiating with happiness.

But he was most worried every time he would only get "Hmm" for a reply.

Her silence has always scared him.

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**Theme 18: Photograph**

Right from the very beginning, he told himself that he would never give her up. Even when she started to push him away, he swore to himself that he would fight for her to the very end.

They succeeded many battles together - Kaho, Sakura, her mother, and society. They faced it all together, but he never thought that after all that they've been through, he would still end up losing her the same way he lose her in his previous lifetimes.

Death claimed her too quickly, and all that was left of her memory was a torn picture tucked at the billfold of his wallet.

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Comments are appreciated. 


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